Featured Essays

Facebook: Enabling a Codependent World

by Nick Galieti

fb_icon_325x325Originally conceptualized in the 1980’s, codependency been defined as a description of relationship behaviors and mental health status of those who are connected with someone considered to be an alcoholic. Today, what constitutes codependency has been broadened in its scope. Wikipedia offers a rather substantive definition of this larger umbrella of codependency: “Codependent relationships are a type of dysfunctional helping relationship where one person supports or enables another person’s drug addiction, alcoholism, gambling addiction, poor mental health, immaturity, irresponsibility, or under-achievement.”

Spouses of “dependents”, or even family and friends, can develop patterns of behavior where a codependent individual feels compelled to “save” the dependent who is “in peril.” This pattern of behavior presents itself by the need to make up for the dependents faults or answering for the collateral damage a dependent may cause. This will feel like a genuine caring effort to minimize the damage caused or to limit the suffering of those around the dependent person. What often looks like “helping” or caring behavior, can turn negative when the “saving” becomes excessive and persistent, even compulsive and thus permissive of the destructive behavior of the dependent.

Wikipedia goes on to say, “Among the core characteristics of codependency, the most common theme is an excessive reliance on other people for approval and a sense of identity. A codependent is someone who cannot function from their innate self and whose thinking and behavior is instead organized around another person, or even a process, or substance. In this context, people who are addicted to a substance, like drugs, or a process, like gambling or sex, can also be considered codependent.”

The token phrase of codependency is “Once they fix their issue, my problems will be fixed too.” (more…)

New Year’s Resolutions, Getting Healthy, and Your Word of Wisdom

by Bonnie

tired-fitness-womanWe are three weeks into the New Year, just past that magic 21-days-to-establish-a-new-habit threshold, and facing the fact that, statistically, about 80% of new gym members in January quit going by mid-February and more than 50% of people have failed at their resolutions generally. Overall statistics vary but the number of the apparently 40-50% of people who make New Year’s resolutions annually who commit to health goals is between 40 and 50% of that total. We have a common interest in improving our health but a great deal of difficulty doing so. Why is that? (more…)

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